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Hi all. Big body of text: so after eight years of believing I was just something fucked up (from the age of twelve,) when I was nineteen, I discovered that people can be 'transgender,' and immediately and for fucking once believed I understood myself. However, through relationships and family matters and stuff I made efforts to deny my gender identity, even though the idea explained me so well, and so I've wasted years and da da da I'll cut out all the bullshit and skip to now.

I'm twenty-two and broke; I'll soon begin electrolysis, and with the cost of living and trying to save for a car and stuff I simply can not afford to go to a therapist. Not to mention the misery I've faced for so long is really starting to wring my neck and it's begging me to do something now. So I've decided to self medicate. Although I know it's risky, for me, so is waiting any longer. It's become a serious detriment to my emotional stability, and the quality of my life in general. I don't know if it was necessary to explain all of that, but there it is, for what it's worth.

The reason for my post is for some opinions on where I can acquire estrogen/androgen blockers, which ones I should consider, and how I should begin taking them (with regard to dosages.)

Your opinions are greatly valued. I can't express how much I'd appreciate any information you can send my way. <3 Picture related: me.